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books on surviving an affair

Getting Past the Affair by Douglas K. Snyder, PhD, Donald H Baucom, PhD, Kristina Coop Gordon, PhD

Discovering that a partner has been unfaithful hits you like an earthquake. Long after the first jolt, emotional aftershocks can make it difficult to be there for your family, manage your daily life, and think clearly about your options. Whether you want to end the relationship or piece things back together, Getting Past the Affair guides you through the initial trauma so you can understand what happened and why before deciding how to move forward. Based on the only program that’s been tested–and proven–to relieve destructive emotions in the wake of infidelity, this compassionate book offers support and expert advice from a team of award-winning couple therapists. If you stay with your spouse, you’ll find realistic tips for rebuilding your marriage and restoring trust. But no matter which path you choose, you’ll discover effective ways to recover personally, avoid lasting scars, and pursue healthier relationships in the future.

Torn Asunder by Dave Carder with Duncan Jaenicke

Written by respected pastor and marriage counselor Dave Carder, this revised and expanded version of Torn Asunder sorts through the factors that contribute to infidelity and then maps out a recovery process for both partners. With compassion and wisdom rooted in the Bible, Carder offers insight for the victims of adultery, the perpetrators, and those who seek to help hurting couples.

Surviving an Affair by Dr. Willard F. Harley, Jr., Dr. Jennifer Harley Chalmers

A guide to understanding and surviving every aspect of infidelity–from the beginning of an affair through the restoration of the marriage.

Desperate Marriages by Gary Chapman

Countless couples today face major marital struggles. But the story doesn’t have to end there.  Dr. Gary Chapman communicates genuine hope for every marriage–even for those with deeply rooted wounds.  Chapman provides positive steps for dealing with spouses who are: Workaholics ; Controlling ; Uncommunicative ; Physically, verbally, or sexually abusive ; Unfaithful ; Alcoholic or drug-abusing ; Depressed ; Irresponsible.

Hope for the Separated by Gary Chapman


The unfortunate reality is that Christians are separating and divorcing at the same rate as the unbelieving world. But does separation have to mean the end? You may not feel like reconciling. You may not see hope for a reunion. But the biblical ideal for a separated couple is reconciliation. So how do you do it? When doors slam and angry words fly, when things just aren’t working out, and even when your spouse has abandoned your trust, there is hope. Hope for the Separated will show you through God’s Word that your marriage can be restored. Recognizing that restoration will not happen for everyone, Dr. Chapman also gives insightful advice for those who experience the pain of divorce.

Helping Couples Get Past the Affair byDonald H. Baucom, Douglas K. Snyder Kristina Coop Gordon

From leading marital therapists and researchers, this unique book presents a three-stage therapy approach for clinicians working with couples struggling in the aftermath of infidelity. The book provides empirically grounded strategies for helping clients overcome the initial shock, understand what happened and why, think clearly about their best interests before they act, and move on emotionally, whether or not they ultimately reconcile. The volume is loaded with vivid clinical examples and carefully designed exercises for use both during sessions and at home.

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